{"product_id":"a-catholic-walks-into-a-bar-t-shirt","title":"A Catholic Walks Into A Bar T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eYou already knew the punchline before you finished reading it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\"A Catholic Walks Into a Bar\" in heavy distressed block lettering. Three dots. \"And Genuflects.\" That is it. That is the whole joke. And if you got it immediately, this shirt was made for you. The muscle memory is real. Slide into a pew, walk past a tabernacle, enter anywhere with a slightly formal threshold, and the knee starts bending on its own. It is not a bit. It is formation. Bold, worn-in serif text filling the whole chest on charcoal. No illustrations needed when the punchline is this good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eUltra-soft ring-spun cotton. Printed in the USA. True to size. XS to 5XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eEvery Certified Catholic purchase donates 10% of profits to Catholic Charities USA.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Certified Catholic","offers":[{"title":"Charcoal \/ XS","offer_id":66861806420013,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ S","offer_id":66861806452781,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ M","offer_id":66861806485549,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ L","offer_id":66861806518317,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ XL","offer_id":66861806551085,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 2XL","offer_id":66861806583853,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 3XL","offer_id":66861806616621,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 4XL","offer_id":66861806649389,"sku":null,"price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 5XL","offer_id":66861806682157,"sku":null,"price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":66861806125101,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":66861806157869,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":66861806190637,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":66861806223405,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":66861806256173,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":66861806288941,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":66861806321709,"sku":null,"price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":66861806354477,"sku":null,"price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":66861806387245,"sku":null,"price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0751\/0864\/6957\/files\/acatholicwalksintoabarcharcoalmockup.jpg?v=1781364377","url":"https:\/\/certifiedcatholic.com\/products\/a-catholic-walks-into-a-bar-t-shirt","provider":"Certified Catholic","version":"1.0","type":"link"}